It’s Christmas Eve! I love today, everybody is nice and full of joyful expectations, we are all very close to the holidays (if not already off from work or school) and the city sparkles with red and gold Christmas decorations. I’m feeling quite festive as well, I think today I’ll finally lit the Christmas-tree candle I have in my living room, as it fills the room with pine and wood notes. It’s such a nice smell, I’m trying to make it last as many Christmases as I can by burning it only for a few hours every holiday.
I am working today, but I’ll try my best to hit the publish button by the end of the day. It’s already 7:30 am as I’m writing, though today I’m not going to the office and therefore will be saving a good couple of hours of commute that I can use for this post. I am quite behind with Christmas presents, but I really wanted to make sure I’d say Happy Christmas to my readers today before midnight.
And yes, it’s not a typo, I am behind with Christmas presents. This year I’m feeling quite lost, in a good way, but still lost. It is the very first time in my life I had not bought all the Christmas gifts by November. In fact, I’ve only bought two, for L. I’m also very, very late with Christmas cards, so late I might just send postcards to my family while in Spain for NYE. I’m feeling lost like I don’t know what to do by when or how. I promise I’m usually very organised and on top of everything, but not this year and I decided that’s totally fine.
I don’t usually write about work on my blog (I don’t think I’ve ever done it) and I won’t start today. However, let me tell you that the last few months, or well, the last year, was intense. We had to work so hard I completely forgot about myself. I feel like I spent the year working hard and wedding planning and now I’m left with no energies or clue about what to do next. Let’s be clear: I’m not complaining. In fact, I’m convinced it’s a very good thing because I’ve reached a point I’m finally forcing myself to calm down, relax, let go and just enjoy my own company again.
In order to find myself again, I’ve started to declutter my house. It’s something I do at least twice a year. I grew up in a big family with lots of sisters and as you can imagine, for a big family to thrive there have to be rules. One of the rules was to periodically go through our shelves and units and throw away everything we did not need, like or use any longer. We would only keep the notebooks we actually needed, the clothes that were still fitting and the toys we were still playing with and let go of the rest.
At first, I used to hate it. I remember I would spend my days filling my shelves with objects that reminded me of other people or events where I had fun. They had no purpose except reminding me not to forget. Learning how to get rid of them was hard, but then the feeling of freedom once my shelves were clear and ready to be filled with new memories was so liberating. That’s why I still go through the same journey every so often. I open a cupboard and select what I’m still using and what I still like. If I’m not 90% sure I’ll use that item in the next year (or simply don’t like it), I’ll either give it to charity or throw it away. It’s one of the most liberating experiences for me. It’s as if everything I own holds a place in my head and getting rid of it allows me to find some peace of mind.
Embracing this attitude has also taught me not to buy what I don’t actually need or like. I won’t buy items I don’t have a real use for just to have the free delivery, because I know I’ll end up getting rid of them and that’s not exactly environmentally friendly or wise. I keep a wish list and if something has been there for long enough, I’ll let L know or buy it myself.
Sorry, I may have talked at length about my sort of minimalist lifestyle. I just wanted to let you know that this Christmas, once again, I’m going through my life to find some space for myself. Decluttering the house is a way for me to find space to be myself, free from everything that does not belong to me any longer. Yesterday, I went through my old photographs and deleted all the ones that remind me about events I’d rather forget. I felt so good after doing that. I also deleted the movies I know I won’t watch again, creating space in my hard drive. I even clicked the unsubscribe button on all the marketing emails I’ve received this week, finally!
I am now in a happier spot and I am fully ready for Christmas. I may be buying gifts late and my family will receive their cards a few days later than the usual but I’m jolly and cheerful and what’s more important, I’m here again, ready to make this blog a more personal space. As you can tell by the photos, I also took some time to go to Brixton to shop and have a coffee with L (if you live close by, you need to try Brixton Blend coffee, so good!).
Now it’s time to stop talking about myself (such a selfish person) and talk about you guys! I wish you the happiest Christmas and I wish you find the time to slow down, relax, breathe and enjoy some well-deserved, quality family time!