Summer seems to have finally arrived in London and if I had to choose a sentence to describe these past few weeks, that would be: I need to sleep, please let me sleep! I’m feeling tired and exhausted, as my body gets used to the heat and the lower blood pressure. I’d need a day to just lay on my bed and breathe. At the same time, I’m getting more and more excited for our upcoming wedding! It’s getting real, it’s happening and I’m starting to understand it now.
Back in October last year, it felt something distant and mysterious, we didn’t know what to do, we hadn’t been to many weddings before (only one each, ages ago) so it was all a g i g a n t i c , e n o r m o u s question mark. Now we are slowly taking all the little decisions, we are going to our fourth wedding of the year in July (yes, all our friends and family decided to get married this year, which was very helpful) and we are even starting to consider what to do afterwards
though that part is still very blurry. The picture I have in mind for our big day is coming together and I can feel the countdown in my stomach: it’s like having a billion butterflies, it’s all over the place.
I can’t believe we are really getting married. I’ve never thought I would get married in my life. In my mind, there have always been 2 categories of people: those who would get married and those who would not. I’ve always felt I was part of the latter. I’ve always done things my own way, I’ve never cared too much and I wouldn’t say I’m an easy person to deal with. I’ve been with the wrong guys, I’ve made so many mistakes in terms of relationships, yet here I am, with an engagement ring on my finger. I’ve somehow broken the infinite circle of wrong decisions and today I feel I’m the luckiest person on Earth. Sometimes I tell myself that I truly won the lottery with L. He’s caring and he loves me like no other but most of all he believes in me more than I do, which is simply crazy.
L and I have been together for almost four years, we’ve travelled around the world and we’ve watched all the episodes of Big Bang Theory and Masterchef Italia together. We’ve taken thousands of pictures, we’ve had countless spritz and we’ve spent infinite Saturday mornings cleaning the house. I can still remember when we first met, our tiny little flat in Sydney, the difficulties of the year we spent living apart and then our amazing life in London. He’s always been there, he was the one who pushed me to write more, try and experiment with blogs and videos, look for a better job. Saying yes was the easiest part for me. I could not imagine sharing my life with anyone else, let alone watching This is Us, our new favourite TV series, without him. I didn’t have to think twice when he proposed totally unexpectedly the day before my 27th birthday.
Of course, he’s not perfect and neither am I. We fight, we have arguments and we don’t always agree on everything. Sometimes he’s right, sometimes I’m right, but that’s not the point. The point is that we talk through our problems and we keep going. I’d say we are stronger than our fights. I think that is what makes me believe we can make it, we can get married and survive. Once a former colleague of mine told me that the best part of marriage for him came after the wedding when you are married and there’s no big event to plan. I believe we are lucky enough to be able to say the same. We do want to spend the rest of our lives together, it’s not just about the big day.
So this is how I’m feeling right now: a bit all over the place but very, very happy.
I have to admit that I’m also enjoying planning the big day. The best part of organising a wedding for me is that I have to meet and work with so many different people. It’s not only the photographer, the restaurant or the DJ, I’m talking about all the friends that are here to give me an advise whenever I need help. My sisters, as usual, are also playing an important part so yes, I’d like to say my wedding will be the sum of the effort of all these special people working together towards something beautiful. I’ve always been very independent and I usually try to deal with life on my own, but not this time: this time I want to share this day as much as I can, I want everyone to feel involved and loved.
Am I scared? A little bit. I’m also quite thrilled and to be fair, I really can’t wait to have this marvellous party with all my favourite people in the whole world!
What about you? What are your tips from your wedding? I could use your help!